Food and Exercise Journal

Breakfast- 1 1/2 cups bran cereal
                 1/4 cup trail mix
                 1 cup skim milk
                 water (16.9 oz)

Lunch- 3 slices turkey, 1 slice cheese and honey
            mustard on 2 slices whole wheat bread
            water (16.9 oz)

Snack- 1 banana

Dinner- 1 bowl white bean chicken chili w/
             lite sour cream and mexican cheese
             water (16.9 oz)

Snack- 16 oz low cal chocolate shake

My eating was really good today. 

I just finished my walk around the neighborhood a few minutes ago.  I decided just to walk today instead of trying to jog because I wanted to get more distance in.  I did 2.8 miles in 39 minutes.

Photo Challenge Day 1

This has nothing to do with weight loss but I decided to begin a challenge where I take a picture everyday for the next 365 days.  I'm hoping this will increase my skills in the area of photography.  In class right now we are studying all these different design elements you can use when taking pictures and I have to admit I have not 1 oz of artisitic talent in me.  I'm hoping that this is something that I can learn because otherwise I'm screwed where photography is concerned.  So here is my first picture that I took on the way home from school.  I just liked the old building sitting among the colorful trees.

(click to enlarge)

I'm including this second picture I took because as I was leaving from taking the first picture 3 wild turkeys crossed the road in front of me.

(click to enlarge)

Not my best work but it is rainy and gloomy here so thats it for today.

Another Monday

Am I the only one that hates Mondays?  I'm not sure why, I don't work so its not that I dread going back to work.  I go to school but I actually like going to school.  I do have to get the kids up for school but then I am free of kids for the rest of the day so its not that either.  I guess Mondays have just always symbolized the beginning of a new week.  A long week of getting up early and spending all day, everyday getting things done.  Maybe its just the laziness in me wishing I could just sleep in and not wake up until midday. 

My typical day begins at 5am and doesn't end until 9:30pm.  I know thats an early bedtime but my husband suffers from insomnia so we go to bed pretty early which I don't mind because I'm exhausted by then.  At least I have no doctor appointments, school events or meetings this week.  You know the saying a mothers work is never done and thats absolutely true.  I just dread getting up and I'm always so tired and have to drag myself out of bed.  Maybe I need to take some kind of vitamin or something.

Does anyone else feel this way?  Have you found taking a vitamin helps? 

Random thoughts

I was thinking earlier about how much I'm going to be accomplishing this next week and all the milestones I will be hitting and I thought it might be fun to list them all in one place.

Lets see tonight was my second attempt at walking/jogging and I was so proud of myself.  I talked my son into going with me and it really helped because he motivated me to push myself harder.  I did 1.8 miles in 22 minutes which isn't to bad I don't think.  My only problem right now is not my body being able to take the jogging but my breathing.  For those that have taken up jogging how long does it take to get past this hurdle?

This week is the last week for two of the challenges I am in so I really need to make it my best week so far.

Stephanie from http://unveilingthediva.blogspot.com/  is hosting a weight loss contest where you have to post a picture of yourself weighing in each Friday and at the end of 6 weeks she is giving a prize to the winner. My beginning weight was 237 lbs.  So far I have lost 11.4 lbs in the last 5 weeks and I would love to lose an even 15 lbs but I don't think thats possible by Friday.  Thank you Stephanie for hosting this contest it really has been a great motivation.

Katie from http://katie-fttw.blogspot.com/  is hosting the Gettin Sexy challenge for the month of October. As part of the challenge I had to come up with some goals that would make me feel sexier by the end of October.  My beginning weight for this challenge was 232.6 lbs.

Here are my goals:
1. Exercise: I'm going to walk 50 miles in the month of October.  So far I have walked 36.7 miles so I have 13.3 miles to walk by Sunday, October 31.
2. Food: I'm giving up soda and fast food for the month of October.  So far I've not had one week where I have been completely soda or fast food free so I'm making this last week that week.
3. Weight: I'm going to lose 10 lbs in the month of October.  As of this morning I had lost 8 lbs so I only need 2 more lbs by Sunday, October 31.

Ok I have a question for anyone that might be able to answer it.  I am trying to watch my sugar intake but there are just certain things that I'm use to having sugar in, for example oatmeal.  I have reduced how much I use but what can I use in place of sugar that is not as bad for me?

I am only 3.3 lbs away from hitting my 10% weight loss goal.  I will have lost a total of 24.7 lbs at this point, I can't believe I'm almost at this goal.

I set a personal goal for myself to walk 160 miles by the end of the year.  Right now I've walked 67.2 miles so by the end of this week I will be at my halfway point.

Earlier this week I wrote a post about my neverending lists and I just wanted to give a quick update.  Since making my lists I have accomplished so much and I plan on finishing up alot of other stuff by this weekend.  It feels so good to be getting things done that I have been putting off.  If you are a procrastinator like I am lists really can help, give it a try.  I also listed my bucket list and one of the things on my list was to take a picture everyday for a year and I am starting that tomorrow.  I plan on sharing those pics on my blog which I hope will inspire me even more to get out and take a picture everyday.

So as you can see this next week is going to be a big week for me.  I'll be working more on my walking/jogging routine and building up my endurance.  I will be completing two challenges and hopefully hitting my 10% weight loss goal plus hitting the halfway point in my personal challenge to walk 160 miles by New Years.  On top of that I'm going to be checking lots of things off my list around home and taking on one of the things on my bucket list.  It feels so good to be accomplishing so much and not feeling like I'm just some fat, lazy, slug laying around wishing I could get things done.

I just thought of a few more things that I needed to add on here.

First off if I have commented on your blog and then you responded to my comment and I never responded back then I'm so sorry.  I know I have been blogging for a few months and I should have known this but I just now figured out that you can subscribe to the blog you comment on so you get all the comments sent to your email.....another duh moment for me.

Secondly is anyone else unable to access their blog stats?  I've sent a comment to tech help and I think they may be working on the problem or at least thats what I was told by someone else.

Lastly if anyone has any healthy easy recipes I would love to hear them.  I would love to have some new recipes that use lots of veggies.  Thanks alot.

Food and Exercise Journal

Breakfast- 1 cup oatmeal w/ 1 tbls brown
                 sugar, 1 tsp butter & 1/4 cup
                 chopped mixed nuts
                water (16.9 oz)

Snack- 1 banana
            water (16.9 oz)

Dinner- 1 cup roasted broccoli
             1 cup roasted squash
             1 cup roasted sweet potato
             1 cup green beans
             1/2 cup corn
             water (16.9 oz)

Snack- 16 oz low cal cheesecake shake

A really good eating day except I probably ate alittle bit to much sugar.  My all veggie dinner was so delicious I didn't even miss the meat.

I just finished my walk/jog, I did 1.8 miles in 22 minutes.

What is different?

This morning started with my husband going out to pick up breakfast for the family.  He had asked me last night before we went to sleep if I wanted him to go get breakfast for everyone and I said that was fine but I didn't want anything.  Well this morning he started being a food pusher again asking me why I didn't want anything....did I think I was to good to eat food like that....that I had the rest of the day to work it off.  I said no I just wanted to eat the healthy breakfast that I had planned to eat and no it wasn't that I thought I was to good its just that eating that kind of food makes me feel bad.  If that wasn't enough to make me cave into eating everything in sight then my kids have been so out of control today.  Sometimes I think having 3 sons is going to drive me crazy.  I have tried every discipline method there is and nothing seems to work.  I know alot of you are parents what works for you?  I just get so tired to listening to all the whining and fighting. 

Between living with a food pusher and feeling like I'm living in a war zone I'm stressed to the max.  The reason I put the title "What is different?" is because thats what I'm wondering what is different this time? Before I started this weight loss journey a day like this would have had me eating everything I could get my hands on to sooth my stress.  Have I learned to deal with these situations?  Have I learned to face my emotions and not bury them with food?  Have a I got to a point where I just can't take being fat anymore?  Could it be the medicine I'm on?  Why do I want to know what is different?  Because I want to make sure I never lose the willpower, motivation, determination or just personal growth that is keeping me going.

I am going to lose the weight this time I have no doubt about that but when you change so drastically over such a short period of time you have to wonder if that change is permanent.  I guess only I can decide that though.  Maybe its the willpower that I gain from other people's negativity.  Maybe its my determination to change my life and make my familes life better.  Maybe its the motivation to be healthy and happy finally.  Or maybe its just my own personal growth to face my fears and overcome the things I have allowed to hold me back.  Whatever it is I'm thankful that I've finally found what it takes to succeed.

Food and Exercise Journal

Breakfast- 1 1/2 cups bran cereal
                 1/4 cup chopped mixed nuts
                 1 cup skim milk

Snack- 1 banana

Lunch- 6 oz smoked chicken breast
            1 scoop potato salad
            1 scoop baked beans
             birthday cake (1"x1" piece)           
             3 bottles water (51 oz)

Snack- 3/4 cup frosted flakes
            3/4 cup rice krispies
            1 cup skim milk
            water (16.9 oz)

I just got home from the birthday party I had to go to today and as you can see I didn't do that bad with my eating.  I'm not going to eat dinner because its already so late but I may have a snack in alittle while.

I'm taking the night off from exercising but I was very active today at the birthday party, walking around talking to everyone, riding a horse and riding a four wheeler.  I really had a great day.

Celebrating with Food

Today is going to be one of those days where I see what I'm made of.  In a few hours I have to go to my nephews 5th birthday party.  Like with any other celebration in my family there is going to be lots of food.  They are having hamburger and hotdogs, potato salad and baked beans, chips and who knows what else.  On top of that dessert will be birthday cake, banana pudding, ice cream and whatever else someone brings.  There will not be one healthy thing at this party to eat. 

I do plan on taking me a couple bottles of water because I know there will be nothing to drink there but tea and sodas.  I've already had my breakfast this morning and a snack.  How do I plan on getting through this party without pigging out?  Well I'm going to allow myself to eat but very small portions.  Maybe a hamburger, one spoonful of potato salad and one spoonful of baked beans.  When its dessert time I will have a tiny piece of cake.  I know that I can eat this and not feel bad because I can come home and workout to make up for it.  I also plan to spend my time taking lots of pictures to distract me from all the food.  I honestly feel like I have the willpower to make it through this without overeating.  Plus I know I have to come back and report to all of you what I ate so the accountability factor is paying off for me.

I did it!!!!

I wrote a post yesterday about my walking becoming to easy and how I wanted to start interval training to build up my endurance to jog.  Well tonight I did it.  I wanted someone in my family to go with me because honestly I was really embarassed to be out jogging by myself but noone wanted to go so I was all on my own.  I began my exercise as normal by walking for a few minutes to warm up and then I looked around to make sure noone was watching and I started a slow jog.  I was actually doing pretty good until I came to a hill and then I felt like I was going to die.  I tried to push through as much as I could but when I couldn't take it anymore I resumed my walking.  Switching between jogging and walking I managed to do 1.8 miles in 25 minutes.  I definitely felt this workout and will be continuing with my interval training until I can run the whole 2 miles around my neighborhood.

I'm so glad that I didn't let my embarassment stop me and even though I worried what others were thinking about someone my size running I know that I'm going to be healthier and eventually slimmer.

Updated Weight Loss Pics

Here are my updated weight loss pictures.  I began my weight loss journey on August 10, 2010 at 247 lbs.  As of this morning I weighed 225.6 lbs which means I have lost 21.4 lbs.

Here is the front view and I can't really see any difference but that doesn't matter because I can tell a difference in how my clothes fit and I have dropped 2 sizes, from a 20 to a 16.

Once again I don't see where I have lost any weight but thats ok eventually I will be able to see a difference in pictures.



Food and Exercise Journal

Breakfast- 1 1/2 cups bran cereal
                 1/4 cup chopped mixed nuts
                 1 cup skim milk
                 water (16.9 oz)

Snack- 1 banana

Lunch- 3 slices turkey, 1 slice cheese and honey
            mustard on 2 slices whole wheat bread
           water (16.9 oz)

Snack- 20 oz low cal chocolate shake

Dinner- meatloaf
            1 cup sweet potato
            1 cup green beans
            1/2 cup corn

           

 (Just in case you are wondering what those orange things are, I diced up sweet potatoes and roasted them in olive oil in the oven then when they came out I rolled them in brown sugar and cinnamon while still warm.  I know I'm suppose to be watching my sugar intake but I didn't eat that many and they were so good.)

.

I did my interval walking/jogging tonight.  Instead of jogging 60 seconds and then walking 90 seconds like it said for beginners on http://www.coolrunning.com/engine/2/index.shtml  I just jogged as far as I could and then I walked.  I ended up doing half my distance jogging.  I did really good on flat land but when I got to the hills it was just to hard but at least I pushed myself tonight.  I was really embarassed at first worrying about what people who drove by were thinking about someone my size jogging but I got over that.  They may be thinner than me but at least I'm going to be healthier.  My time tonight was 1.8 miles in 25 minutes.

Goals, Challenges and Weigh In Updates

I'm using this post to list all my personal challenges and other blogger challenges in one place so I can keep up with them. I know it seems like I have taken on alot but its keeping me motivated and keeping me busy so I don't think about food so much. So here it goes with all my challenges and updates will be in red.

Weight loss goals (2 lbs a week):
November 2, 2010- 221 lbs (I weigh 225.6 lbs.)
November 30, 2010- 213 lbs (34 lb loss for Thanksgiving, thats a lot to be thankful for)
December 28, 2010- 205 lbs (42 lb loss for Christmas would make it a very merry Christmas)
January 25, 2011- 197 lbs
February 22, 2011- 189 lbs (under 200 for valentines how sweet that would be)
March 22, 2011- 181 lbs
April 19, 2011- 173 lbs
May 17, 2011- 165 lbs (it would be nice to celebrate our 5 year anniversary with me at this weight)
June 14, 2011- 157 lbs
July 12, 2011- 149 lbs ( 2 days before my birthday what a wonderful birthday present to myself)
August 9, 2011- 141 lbs (this would be the smallest I have ever been)

Recommended Daily Allowances:
(not really a challenge but something I need to keep an eye on)
Calories: 1760 to lose 2 lbs a week
              2260 to lose 1 lb a week
Fat: 64 grams
Fiber: 25 grams
Carbohydrates: 300 grams
Sugar: 40 grams
Protein: 50 grams
Sodium: 2400 milligrams

Exercise:

As you can see I have a new ticker on the right side of my screen now and it starts at 0 and goes to 160. I have challenged myself to walk a 160 miles by New Years.

(I have walked 64 miles so far in this challenge.)

Weight Loss Contest: Stephanie from http://unveilingthediva.blogspot.com/  is hosting a weight loss contest where you have to post a picture of yourself weighing in each Friday and at the end of 6 weeks she is giving a prize to the winner. My beginning weight was 237 lbs.

(I have lost 11.4 lbs in the last 5 weeks on this challenge.)

Here is what my scale said this morning.

Hot 100 Challenge:

Steve from http://logmyloss.com/  is hosting the Hot 100 Challenge. The Hot 100 is a challenge focused on the last 100 days of 2010 beginning September 23, 2010. Here are my goals:

#1....This was my own personal challenge anyway so I'm adding it as my first goal here.....walk 160 miles by New Years.

(I have walked 64 miles so far.)

#2....Continue to eat healthy and exercise so I can lose 20 lbs by New Years. Beginning weight 235.4 lbs.

(I have lost 9.6 lbs so far.)

#3....Make it through the holiday season without falling back into old eating patterns.

(Haven't had to worry about this yet but I have a Halloween party coming up soon and all the kids trick or treat candy.)

Weekly Goals (10/16/10-10/22/10):
(my own personal goals)
1. Water- My goal has been to drink 128 oz of water a day but I still have not managed to accomplish this so that is my first goal this week.
(Have been averaging about 51 to 68 oz a day so I'm changing this goal to 96 oz of water a day.)
2. Sugar- I posted yesterday about my sugar intake and how I was eating more than I should be and I got alot of feedback from fellow bloggers. Their recommendation was to watch the sugar content in the processed foods I eat so that is my next goal. I hope this next week to greatly reduce how much sugar I'm eating.
(I have done really good or at least I think so on watching my sugar intake.)
3. Fruits- I love fruits especially sweet fruits like bananas, apples and grapes but I have learned that fruits have alot of natural sugar in them so you do need to watch how much you eat so my goal this next week is to keep my fruit intake to a maximum of 1-2 servings per day.
(I have managed to keep my fruits to 1-2 servings per day but a couple days I didn't eat any at all.)
4. Vegetables- I have always been a vegetable eater but I have had to learn to replace some of my carbs like macaroni and cheese and mashed potatoes with vegetables instead. I am learning to try new vegetables that I've never had before to add some variety into my eating and vegetables really are good for you and help to fill you up. So my next goal for this week is to try at least one new vegetable and make sure I get my daily servings of veggies in.
(I had a few days where I didn't get in all my veggies)
5. Carbohydrates- This is probably one of my favorite types of foods, I mean who doesn't love macaroni and cheese and pasta dishes and breads but if you aren't careful these types of food can put alot of weight on you. So this next week I plan on really watching my intake of carbs.
(I'm still doing pretty good at watching my carbs I think I'm staying under my goal of 300 grams a day.)
6. Exercise- I have been doing really good at exercise but I am adding that as one of my goals so that I make sure I continue to get all of my exercise in. I am challenging myself to walk 5-6 days this week and at least 12 miles.
(I missed two days of walking this last week but with my workout tonight I will have in 12 miles.)
7. Soda- I have mainly been drinking water but I have been sneaking in a couple diet sodas a week and I want to set a goal to not drink any sodas this next week.
(I did drink one diet soda but one isn't going to kill me.)
8. Fast Food- I try to pick the healthiest thing when I get fast food but like a friend pointed out to me no fast food is healthy. I'm only picking out the least unhealthy thing on the menu so this is definitely something I need to give up. So my last goal is to completely avoid fast food this next week.
(I did have a veggie burger and two tacos this past week.)

Gettin Sexy Challenge:
Katie from http://katie-fttw.blogspot.com/  is hosting this challenge for the month of October. As part of the challenge I have to come up with a goal that will make me feel sexier by the end of October. So here are my goals and I'm choosing more than one because they all kind of go together. Beginning weight for this challenge: 232.6 lbs

1. Exercise: I'm going to walk 50 miles.
(I have in 33.2 miles so far.)
2. Food: I'm giving up soda and fast food.
(Had one diet soda this last week and a veggie burger and two tacos.)
3. Weight: I'm going to lose 10 lbs.
(I have lost 7 lbs so far.)

I Refuse to Blow it Over the Holidays Challenge:
This challenge is being hosted by Erika at http://wwwfatlikeme.blogspot.com/2010_09_01_archive.html . Its just a personal challenge not to overeat during the holidays. You just keep track of how much weight you have lost from the first day of fall until after New Years. My beginning weight was 235.4 lbs.

(I have lost 9.6 lbs so far in this challenge.)

I know this seems like alot of goals and challenges but they all kind of fit together I just want to be able to update all of them on the same day to make it easier for me to remember.

It's getting easier!!!!

I just went for my walk alittle while ago and it's getting easier.  When I first started walking I was out of breath and it took everything I had to keep going.  Now I'm breathing normally and my heart doesn't feel like its going to jump out of my chest.  Its so nice to know that I'm strengthening my body.  I think its time to up my workouts.  I don't think increasing the time is the way to go I think I need to start interval training.

Awhile back someone sent me the link to this site http://www.coolrunning.com/engine/2/index.shtml and I wish I knew who it was but I can't find the post anywhere.  If it was someone reading this just let me know and I will add your name to this post.  I looked over this site and it gives you alot of tips on how to work your way up to running.  I am definitely a beginner so I'm thinking I need to take the approach they discuss on this site where you do intervals of running and then walking.  Over time your able to run farther and farther. 

I know alot of you are runners, how did you train yourself to run?  Any tips would really be appreciated because I definitely don't want to hurt myself first thing and then be out of commission for awhile.

Food and Exercise Journal

Breakfast- 1 1/2 cups bran cereal
                 1/4 mixed nuts
                 1 cup skim milk
                 water (16.9 oz)

Lunch- small bowl of taco chili w/ lite sour cream
            water (16.9 oz)

Snack- 20 oz low cal strawberry milkshake

Dinner- 2 riblets
             1/4 cup corn
             1 cup roasted squash
             1 cup green beans
             1/2 cup baked beans
              water (16.9 oz)

I tried not to eat alot today because I have to weigh in the morning.

I walked 2 miles in 28 minutes around my neighborhood.

Now for my goals that I set for the week:
1. Water- 51 oz.
2. Sugar- within limits
3. Fruit- none
4. Vegetables- at dinner
5. Carbs- within limits
6. Exercise- 2 mil/28 min.
7. Soda- none
8. Fast food- none

My Neverending Lists

I posted yesterday about taking control of my life and getting refocused.  As part of this process I stated that I was going to make out lists for every aspect of my life.....from school to home.  The purpose of these lists are to give me a starting point to accomplish everything I need to get done.  Raych from http://losingwithraych.blogspot.com left me a comment saying that she would love to see my lists so I agreed to post some of them today.  I'm still not done because my lists are always a work in progress but here is what I have so far.

I just began with a plain notebook and wrote down everything that I needed to do or remember.  Most of these lists run through December 31, 2010 and then I will start a new list.
1.  The first few pages in my notebook are devoted to my finances.  I won't go into detail on this but its just the bills I have due and when and what money I have coming in.  I also made out my Christmas shopping list because its only 66 days away. 
2.  The next 5 pages list all my daily and weekly chores and big jobs around my house I have been putting off.  I'm not going to post my lists here because then you all would know I'm crazy....lol... but I have it broke down room by room and outside jobs. 
3.  The next section explains what each one of my children are doing in school right now and what they need help from me on. 
4.  I have one page devoted to phone calls I need to make or return which I always seem to forget.
5.  I have my grocery list made out for the month.
6.  A page for appointments and special events
7.  All my assignments and tests for my photography class, when they are assigned and due.
8.  My college schedule of classes that I need to take to finish the photography program.
9.  And a chore list for each one of my kids.

The next few lists are about my weight loss.
10. I made out a calendar where I am going to write down my weight after I weigh in every morning.  Some people think this is unhealthy but it helps me to see where I am going wrong.
11. A page where I can set goals for my walking from now until the end of the year so I can meet my 160 miles that I'm trying to walk by New Years and I might even increase this goal.
12. I made out a list of the things I still need to work on to improve my weight loss and health.  I will be adding more things to this list but this is all I have right now.
     a.  Drink at least 96 oz of water daily.
     b.  Eat more vegetables.
     c.  Walk 5-6 times a week.
     d.  No eating after 6 PM.
     e.  Start strength training.
     f.  No drinking soda.
     g.  No eating fast food.
     h.  Take a multivitamin.
13. A page listing my weight loss goals if I managed to lose 2 lbs a week. 
14. And my recommended daily allowances.
I have most of these things listed on my blog but I want them where I can access them quickly if I need to remember what I'm trying to accomplish.

The last thing I have in my notebook is my bucket list.  If you don't know what a bucket list is its a list that you make up telling everything you would like to do or accomplish before you kick the bucket (slang for die).
So here is my bucket list:
1.  Graduate college.
2.  Get a job after I graduate college.
3.  Purchase a house.
4.  Get to a healthy weight.
5.  Go on a cruise.
6.  Run a marathon.
7.  Donate blood.
8.  Take my kids to Disneyland.
9.  Visit Niagra Falls.
10. Sell a picture that I have taken.
11. Take a photo everyday for a year.
12. Start my own business.
13. Visit the Grand Canyon.
14. Visit a foreign country.
15. Drive across country.
16. Have a picture I have taken published in a magazine.
17. Have a picture I have taken published on the front cover of a magazine.
18. Finish all my current scrapbooks.
I know some of these will probably never happen but thats the fun of making a bucket list because you can list anything that pops into your head.

Well I've spent most of the morning working on my lists and have yet to start doing any of the things so I guess I better get busy now.

Taking Control and Refocusing

I wrote a post earlier today about recommitting myself to my weight loss goals and I am determined to do that, but I also need to take control of my life and refocus on the things that are important. 

Just so you understand what I'm talking about here is alittle background information on myself.  I have a very specific pattern in my life and its like clockwork.  I find something that I really want to do and I get all gung ho and take on the challenge full force but that momentum only lasts so long and then I crash.  I do this with house cleaning....with dieting.....with craft projects....with pretty much everything.  I feel like if I'm not doing everything perfectly then I'm failing.  Of course its nice to always try to do your best but for example in school if I make anything less than a 100 then I feel like I'm failing myself. 

Right now I'm in the downward cycle of this pattern.  I'm not making out my lists like I use to which always motivated me to get things done.  I'm not thinking out my eating or planning ahead, I'm just eating what is available.  I haven't worked on my scrapbooks in probably a year and this is something I use to love to do.  I'm procrastinating with alot of things and just being plain lazy.  Now when I come out of this cycle I will be like a crazy woman trying to fix all the damage I have done and accomplish everything I have let pile up.  I do recognize that this isn't a healthy pattern and its definitely something I need to work on.

I recommited myself to my weight loss journey this morning and I want to do the same thing with other things in my life.  I need to take a healthy approach to these things though.  I still think lists are my best tool and give me a starting point so when I get back from walking in a few minutes I'm going to make out a list of all the things I would like to accomplish around my home, in school, with my weight loss, with my kids and with life in general.  This sounds like alot and it may take me some time to do but it will be worth so I can start working towards all my goals.  I have to find ways to get myself out of this destructive pattern I live in instead of waiting for it to cycle through.

Does anyone else feel like they go through these patterns?  Do you go from 100% motivated to completely not caring?  What do you do to get yourself out of this pit?

Food and Exercise Journal

Breakfast- 1 1/2 cups bran cereal
                 1 banana
                 1 cup skim milk
                 water (16.9 oz)

Lunch- small bowl taco chili with
            lite sour cream, mexican cheese
            and tortilla chips
           water (16.9 oz)

Snack- 1/4 cup mixed nuts

Dinner- 6 oz rotisserie chicken breast
            1 cup roasted yellow squash
            water (16.9 oz)

Eating was good today.  I didn't eat much for dinner because I wasn't that hungry. 

I walked 3 miles in 45 minutes around my neighborhood.

Now for my goals that I set for the week:
1. Water- 51 oz.
2. Sugar- within limits
3. Fruit- 1 serving
4. Vegetables- 1 serving
5. Carbs- within limits
6. Exercise- 3 mil/45 min.
7. Soda- none
8. Fast food- none

Recommitment

Life can get so hectic that we forget about our own needs to worry about everyone elses.  That's where I feel like I'm heading lately.  Between going to school, cleaning, cooking, raising 3 kids and all the other random stuff that comes along with being a mother and wife I'm stressed to the max. 

I'm still eating right and exercising but it just seems like I'm losing some of my momentum.  I'm going through the motions but I'm not really focused on what I'm trying to achieve.  Maybe thats a good thing, maybe that means its becoming habit and I don't have to think about losing weight every second of the day but if thats true then this is a new experience for me. 

It's hard to keep going on this journey when you are surrounded by people who really don't support you.  I know there are people around me that are secretly wishing I would fail once again.  To those people I say KISS MY BIG FAT ASS because your negativity only gives me strength and determination to keep going.

I wrote this post to remind myself why I started this weight loss journey.  It's my time to put myself first and to become who I know I can be and I refuse to let anyone or anything stand in my way.  I will not spend one more second of my life damaging my body, mind or spirit.  I love my family and I will continue to do everything I can to take care of them but I need time to take care of myself to.  Like the saying goes if momma ain't happy nobody's happy. 

I am recommitting myself to my weight loss goals and to everything I'm trying to accomplish, not only for myself but for my family to.  I need to get refocused on what's most important right now and stop letting everything else stand in my way.  Screw the people that don't support me because I don't need you to succeed.  I'm the star of this show and its time for me to shine.

Taco Chili

Last night Charlotte from  http://fathairday.blogspot.com/ posted a recipe for taco soup which can be found at this link http://fathairday.blogspot.com/2010/10/theres-taco-in-my-soup.html.  It sounded really yummy and looked just as good but my family isn't really a fan of soups so I decided to adapt the recipe to make chili.  I have to say that it was delicious and I think this will be my standard chili recipe from here on out.  Here is my list of ingredients:

Taco Chili
3 lbs of hamburger
1 large onion
2 packages taco seasoning
2 tbls of cumin
2 cans pinto beans
2 cans black beans
2 cans kidney beans
2 cans rotel tomatoes with green chiles
1 small can tomato sauce

Toppings:
Lite sour cream
Mexican cheese
Tortilla chips

All I did to prepare the chili was brown the hamburger and onion then drain the grease.  Then dump everything else in and heat through.  I added extra cumin because I love the flavor of cumin but you can leave that out depending on your taste.  Charlotte also used a can of corn and Hidden Valley Ranch dressing mix but I left those things out.  We topped our taco chili with lite sour cream, mexican cheese and tortilla chips.  Here is what it looked like before I scarved it down.

Food and Exercise Journal

Breakfast- 1 1/2 cups bran cereal
                 1 banana
                 1 cup skim milk

Snack- 1 honeynut cheerio milk and cereal bar
            diet coke (16 oz)

Lunch- veggie burger on whole wheat bun w/
            lettuce, tomato and onions
            water (16.9 oz)

Snack- 2 bites of chocolate chip cookie
            1/4 cup mixed nuts           
            water (16.9 oz)

Dinner- taco chili w/ lite sour cream, cheddar
            cheese and tortilla chips
            water (16.9 oz)

Snack- low cal banana pudding milkshake (8 oz)
            water (16.9 oz)

Today was ok eating wise I guess.

I walked 2.7 miles, not the 4 miles I wanted to but I will walk some extra tomorrow to make up the rest.

Now for my goals that I set for the week:
1. Water- 68 oz.
2. Sugar- alittle to much
3. Fruit- 1 serving
4. Vegetables- not enough
5. Carbs- within limits
6. Exercise- 2.7 mil/45 min.
7. Soda- 16 oz
8. Fast food- veggie burger