Monday, November 8, 2010

Losing focus, emotional eating and recommitment

I feel like I'm losing my focus alittle bit.  I'm not eating bad or giving up my exercise but I don't feel like I'm putting as much energy into losing weight the right way.  I did eat out again today but I had a veggie sub from Subway so that wasn't that bad.  I also got an almond joy cappuchino which I was craving for some reason and I had one of those bad thoughts like "I deserve this because of what I'm going through".  How is consoling myself with food going to help?  I can't let these kinds of thoughts creep back in.  I would rather lose the weight and feel better because my body is healthier than splurge on food that I don't need just to get a temporary fix.  As for what I ate today its not that bad.

Breakfast- 1 1/2 cups bran cereal
                 1/4 cup chopped mixed nuts
                 1 cup skim milk
                 water (16.9 oz)

Lunch- 6 inch veggie sub on whole wheat bread (Subway)
            12 oz almond joy cappuchino
            water (16.9 oz)

Dinner- 1 small slice lasagna
             1 piece garlic bread
             water (16.9 oz)

I do plan on walking in just alittle while and I hope its a great walk because I need one.

Update: I ended up only walking 2.3 miles in 29 minutes because it got dark on me, guess I'm going to have to start earlier from now on.  I did run the last .2 miles and I felt so great after I got done.  There is something about running that just invigorates you.  I think I'm going to start working harder on my running since my husband took his weight bench with him and now I have no way to do my strength training until I can afford to buy some equipment. 

I am recommitting myself to my weight loss as of right now because I have worked to hard and come to far to give up now.  I refuse to let food be my source of comfort, I need to learn healthy ways to deal with my emotions.  There is a quote I read last night I think its goes "You never know how strong you are until being strong is all you have left", well its my time to prove to myself just how strong I can be.  I've spent to many years pushing my feelings down with food, its time to start feeling again.  There is no amount of pain that can be as bad as being fat.  I'm not going to spend the rest of my life hating myself.  Maybe this is my time to learn to love myself and then maybe I can learn to appreciate someone else loving me.  I'm going to make everyday of the rest of my life count because we are only given one life and I've already wasted enough of mine.  I'm looking forward to the future because I'm done with the past.


  1. Good for your recommittement! You can do this. I was thinking of attempting a run today but it got dark before I knew it. No time :(


  2. All that matters is that you are still fighting. You are acknowledging that you want to change, now all you have to do is do it. Look to the right of your blog at all of the activity you have done and how great you have been at tracking your progress. Don't stop now! You can do it! :)

  3. You're amazing. That you're staying on track through this major life pitfall is a real testament to your dedication. Yeah, I can see how anyone going through a separation would lose a little motivation, but you're hanging in there. Good for you! You can do this, and you can have everything good in life that you want - weight, health, and EVERYTHING ELSE. You are stronger than you know.

  4. I'm sorry you are going through such a rough time. You can make it through. Continue to treat yourself as well as you have been with healthy eating and exercising though. You deserve this. You have been working so hard! I'm thinking of you!

  5. that is great Christina! I love that quote. I to have been working on replacing eating for stress and emotional relief with walking. I have found that the more stressed I am, the more time I find for walking all the time. It seems to be a good trade off!

  6. All of you are so sweet and so motivating. I love having all this support to keep going.

    Jennifer I know what you mean I think I'm going to start doing my walks during the day while the kids are at school so I don't have to try to squeeze them in before it gets dark.

    Girly Girl I'm definitely not stopping now. I may slow down alittle bit for a few days but I'm already pushing myself to keep going.

    Thanks so much Charlotte you are such a good friend.

    Thanks Wendy you are truly a motivation to me. How you raise such a big family, homeschool them all and take care of yourself on top of everything else is a real testament to what women are capable of when they put their minds to it.

    Shane walking is a great stress reliever and it gives you time to think things out. I'm trying to increase my walking time just because its so peaceful when I'm doing it.