Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Today has been a really stressful day. First I wake up and find that I have lost no weight this week so I decide to go buy a new scale but first I have to go to the doctor and have blood drawn. Now I hate needles but its never as bad as I imagine it to be. So I go to the doctor and leave from there and run and get a scale. Well that was one good thing in my day because the new scale says I have lost a pound. The rest of the day consisted of cleaning the house, doing my exercise for the day, fixing dinner, and studying for a photography test I have tomorrow. By this time the kids are home from school and I always have them do their homework first thing which becomes an all out battle with usually one of them. Today it was my youngest so I made him go to his room and think about why he should have just listened to me and done his homework. We then have dinner and I wash up all the dishes. I then spend the next hour still trying to get my youngest to do his homework, during which I'm still trying to study for my test. As you know I have 3 boys and the oldest does not get along at all with the two younger ones so most of the time its a screaming match around here. I've tried so many times to get things under control but my kids just don't respect me. Oh they are wonderful in school and for everybody else but for me its all out hell around here. Well I sent all three to bed early, the two youngest ones because they don't get up in the morning for me without yelling and pitching a fit and also when bedtimes get here they find any reason to keep coming out of their room. The oldest was sent to bed early because he tries to play parent and tell me what to do. On top of that things are really stressed between my husband and myself because he doesn't believe I am disciplining the kids good enough which I agree with but he has no idea how stressful things are on me. I feel like I am peacekeeper, referee and judge in this house. So all the kids are mad at me for punishing them and my husband is ill with me because I sometimes take my frustration out on him. On top of all of this I'm still trying to study for a test tomorrow which I'm really stressing over. Another thing I am obsessed over is making really good grades. I try to divide myself among everyone and everything but sometimes I feel so stretched thin that I don't know how much more I can take on. I've went back to school to try to make a better life for me and my family but with little support and encouragement from anyone. Plus trying to eat right and exercise and take care of a family and home. As you can tell I'm just a little stressed today, but my main point of this post is that usually when I'm stressed I want to eat. Eat anything in sight, but mainly sweets......chocolate, ice cream, cookies, cake....anything you can think of. But its different now my focus has moved off of food, I guess thats a really good thing but I do feel like I'm missing something. Now I have to deal with this stress in some other form. I literally feel like my head is going to explode, I guess this would be a really good time to exercise but I've already done my exercise for today. Time to find some new ways to deal with stress, any suggestions?