Random Thoughts

I was thinking I can't believe that alittle less than a year ago I was 205 lbs and now I'm having to work so hard just to get back down to that point again.  I want this to be the very last time in my life that I have to lose weight.

I was thinking how lately food has become a second thought.  Its really not that important to me anymore and I don't get that hungry.  I was questioning whether I should even have dinner tonight or just eat a snack later.

I was thinking how great it feels to be so in control of my life and finally not let food rule me.  Why can't everyone else be as happy for me as I am?  Why does it feel like people set out to sabotage you?

I was thinking how proud I am of my son because he has started to exercise with me and he may grow up happy and healthy instead of always struggling with his weight like I did.  It feels good to set a good example for my kids.

I was thinking what is making me so strong and determined to lose weight this time?  Can it really be blogging that is keeping me motivated or was I just that fed up with being overweight?

I was thinking what if I wake up one morning and my motivation is gone and I fail once again?  Nah.....forget that not going to happen.

I was thinking where I will be a year from now.....two years from now....three years from now.  Hopefully at my goal weight....finally accepting and loving every inch of my body and never allowing anyone to make me feel bad about myself again. 

I was thinking how good its going to feel when I've finally accomplished my weight loss goal and I can use all of this energy focusing on improving something else in my life. 

And lastly I was thinking how wonderful its going to feel to let the real me shine and not have to hide behind my fat anymore.  I have grown so much in the last year and I feel like this is just the beginning....from losing weight to going back to school I am starting my life over and making the most of it.  I am a beautiful butterfly emerging from my cocoon.